All the days of my life

A note to those who are single but desiring marriage

2 minute read

April is our anniversary Month! 6 years at the end of it. As a result, I’ve been thinking about things I did or happened to go through before getting married that have helped me and most likely saved us some arguments. A few practical ponderings I’ve realized:

1. We lived with other roommates (not on a college dorm)—shared rent, food, meals, space, and a bathroom. This is the top one that allowed us not to have such a shock to our system when we started sharing and managing a home together. We already knew how to live with someone else and keep a place running.

2. We made our own money and lived independently from our parents. We had to learn to budget on our own.

3. We both spent a LOT of time with children.

4. We spent time with married people even before we were dating as single people.

5. We lived with an awareness and respect that one day, we’d belong to someone else… and so would the people we dated and interacted with before we got married. I’m forever thankful the Lord brought us together after we both lived our whole lives this way.

For me what inspired that last point was Proverbs 31. In verse 12 of that passage it says that “she brought him good all the days of her life.” I noticed it said “all the days of her life”, and not just the days that she was married. Marriage is a season, it is not guaranteed forever yet that scripture says that we are to bring them GOOD all the days of our life (in every season).

So to those who are single, the Lord is working in you right now and potentially preparing you for the good that is waiting in that season. I wouldn’t go back and wish we started dating earlier and got married earlier. Those years have given us a certain level of ease in our marriage that we wouldn’t have otherwise. Everyone’s story is different. You can’t compare it. Some people are supposed to get married right out of highschool or college; but, if that’s not you, it’s important to remember that every day you don’t spend married I believe is making your potential future marriage better than it would be otherwise. Value your desire to one day be married, lean into that, I don’t believe in stifling that or being afraid of it. Trust that the Lord is good and gave you that desire for a reason. Honor him now in your season and know that you have an opportunity now to bring your spouse GOOD in the future.